- So you think you are invincible?
- You think people won’t notice?
- You think you can get out of anything?
- You think the odds are in your favor when you take risks?
- You think parents (and adults who care) are clueless and just don’t want you to have fun? (Well, that may be true.)
This page has some information for you to consider before you do something stupid.
Being a responsible person means using your brain to think through the risks and benefits of choices you make BEFORE YOU MAKE THEM! Inform yourself. You should still take (reasonable) risks. You should still push boundaries . . .
just don’t be a dumb ass about it!
One more thing. With all the exposure you have to media and evil, manipulative marketers, I expect you to have enough sense to know that I am trying to educate you while being sarcastic and funny in the things on this page. I want you to have a healthy, happy adolescence. In my real job, I work very hard to help teenagers and families who run into trouble, sometimes serious trouble. Emotional pain and serious problems are not something to be laughed at. I’m much nicer in person so don’t let this put you off if your parents are dragging you in to see me. (In other words, don’t be a dumbass about me either.)
Updated: 8/28/16
How many cars do you have to risk for this?
There is only so much time in your day. You’ve got to multitask to get everything done. Besides, they don’t mean YOU when they say that texting impairs your driving just as much as driving when you’re drunk.
Of course you can do two things at once. Annnnnnnnd THIS! YOLO!
This will break your heart and should REALLY make you think twice about texting and driving.
Hey, and while you’re at it why don’t you just ignore the possibility that you are addicted to a drug (yes, that includes marijuana). Take a look at this checklist. Well? It’s just bullshit, right? That’s just something other people have a problem with. And you’re young. Everybody your age uses this much.
http://www.ncadd-sfv.org/symptoms/symptom_checklist.html
And, know the law to save yourself some trouble (so you will only have to deal with your parents nailing your ass to the wall for using or doing something stupid)
http://www.tennesseecriminalattorneyblog.com/2007/06/bonnaroo_2007_1.html
And, if an animal is acting weird (or weirdly friendly or weirdly like it wants to chew your face off), DON’T TOUCH IT. It has RABIES, you dumb ass. (But be sure to watch Old Yeller. It’s in the list of movies to watch here.). Just read this and you’ll understand why. Oh, but this little girl is so CUTE! I TOLD you! Now look what’s happened. It’s the PLAGUE.
Look, you have GOT to get it that the internet seems innocent and that it is funny to take naked pictures of yourself and that you can just protect them with privacy settings. People are breaking into that shit all the time. DBADA!
http://gawker.com/5932702/ladies-8000-creeps-on-reddit-are-sharing-the-nude-photos-you-posted-to-photobucket
PAY ATTENTION! The sexually transmitted infection gonorrhea is only one little antibiotic away from being incurable. It is deadly. If you are going to have sex, use a condom! DBADA!
http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2012/08/here-it-comes-super-gonorrhea/260937/
This is a great summary of my views about marijuana, in everyday language
http://www.vice.com/en_ca/read/i-dont-get-smoking-weed?fb_ref=%2Fvice%2Fdnd%2F2450
People really CAN READ YOUR MIND! (Don’t be a dumb ass about your online information)
And another thing, don’t just follow other people like a bunch of bleedin sheep!
Now, TURN OFF THAT DAMN PHONE!
And don’t end up on THIS list!