Remember, this list is not comprehensive and the presence of books on this list does not constitute endorsement for or support of any of the information provided in these books. And, I am still adding the books that go into each of these categories so some of the bookmarks are currently empty.
Revised: 9/9/19
Literature
Book lists created by other people
Fiction
Memoirs, biographies and autobiographies
Allegories, Fables and Fairytales
Religion and spirituality
Life of the mind (thinking, philosophy, making changes)
Information
African American Issues
Academics
ADD/ADHD
Anger & Anger Management
Antiracism and Allyship
Anxiety, Fears and Phobias
BIPOC
Bipolar Disorder
Bullying and harassment
College: Choosing, Applying, Alternatives
Communication
Creativity
Dating and Relationships
Depression
Depressed Parents
Divorce & Separation
Driving
Entrepreneurialism
Failure
Friendships, Peers, Popularity and Cliques
Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning
Giftedness
Girl Issues
Grief, Loss and Death
Guy Issues
Health and Fitness
Internet
Jobs, Employment & Careers
Legal Rights
Making a Difference
Media (TV, Advertisers, Music, etc.)
Morals and Manners
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
Parents, Dealing with Them
Physical Challenges and Chronic Illness (General)
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Schizophrenia
Sexual Abuse, Molestation & Date Rape
Sex and Sexuality
Siblings
Social Skills and Graces
Step-families
Stress and Stress Management
Substance Use and Abuse
Suicide
Tourette Syndrome
Video Games
The Right Moves: to Getting Fit and Feeling Great by Tina Schwager, Michele Schuerger and Elizabeth Verdick
Here’s a gook for girls. It covers the range of issues related to health and exercise.
What Are My Rights? 95 Questions and Answers about Teens and the Law by Thomas Jacobs.
I have never seen another book like this. It is actually written by a lawyer for teens to answer questions like whether they can rent an apartment, can my parents stop me from watching certain TV shows, can I change my name, what is the difference between a felony and a misdemeanor, and many, many more. For the teens that I often work with, this information is right where their questions are coming from. It also has additional places for information on most of the topics. Great, unique book
The Real Trouble About Trouble: A Little Can Turn Into A Lot by Kirk Seufert
Mr. Seufert is a local (Nashville) lawyer who wrote this book out of his experiences with juveniles he has known in his practice and the things he wishes they would learn. It is an interesting little book. While it is sometimes too wordy, it is very effective. I would highly recommend parents read this to their 14-18 year old teens who have begun to get close to or just begin to get into legal trouble. It is a very good cautionary tale
Making a Difference
Heroes for My Son and Heroes for My Daughter by Brad Meltzer
OK, so this fiction writer has a kid and decides that he needs to start identifying role models for when he grows up. It is really sweet . . . and he comes out with a book like this. You might think that a book written for a kid isn’t for you. You’d be wrong. THESE are people who have made a difference in the world and some of them you didn’t even know about. Get it. Read it. Do something about it. Heroes aren’t just people who throw themselves on grenades to save a buddy.
Walk Out Walk On by Margaret J. Wheatley and Deborah Frieze
The author describes 7 communities from around the world where the people are doing creative and remarkable things to try to address seemingly insurmountable problems. See what ordinary people can do who put their mind, heart and creativity to work (and always with each other). You could do this.
Media (TV, Advertising, Music, etc.)
The First Honest Book About Lies by Jonni Kincher
Telling the truth isn’t as straight-forward as it is presented. Lying isn’t either. This book will help you learn how to maintain your integrity, a commitment to honesty and still have friends.
How Rude!: The Teenager’s Guide to Good Manners, Proper Behavior and Not Grossing People Out by Alex J. Packer.
Here it is. The book you have been looking for! Now you can learn how to hold that fork, talk on the phone, blow your nose and, maybe, look like you weren’t raised in a barn. You’ll like this book. It is written in conversational language and is VERY comprehensive. It covers everything.
Stop Obsessing: How To Overcome Your Obsessions and Compulsions by Edna Foa and Reid Wilson.
This book is a very straight forward presentation of OCD. It has a quick assessment to see what your OCD looks like. It then helps you develop a program to begin to manage the OCD. Even if you are working with someone on your OCD, this book can give you a lot of information and an overview of what you will be working on.
The Ray of Hope: A Teenager’s Fight Against Obsessive Compulsive Disorder by Ray St. John.
Ray wrote this book at a 17yo with OCD. It is a really good introduction to what it is like to have OCD (which you already know but can find out that you are so alone as you thought).
Kissing Doorknobs by Terry Spencer Hesser
This is a book written about a fictional 11 yo girl with OCD. It is a good read about how OCD can affect your life (and how you can learn to live with it).
Freeing Your Child From Obsessive Compulsive Disorder by Tamar Chansky
If you are a teenager, this book can actually give you a lot of good information (written for adults) on OCD and on ways to manage it (even though it is written for parents). It is easy to read, comprehensive and well organized. Worth considering as background reading for your OCD.
Bringing Up Parents: The Teenager’s Handbook by A. J. Packer.
This is a humorous and informative book about how to deal with parents by building trust, respect and heading off problems. It is well written but you will have to be the kind of kid who actually tries to figure your way out of situations rather than just getting pissed and blowing up or sneaking around it.
Finding My Way: A Teen’s Guide to Living with a Parent Who Has Experienced Trauma by Michelle D. Sherman and DeAnne M. Sherman.
When something bad happens to your parent it effects everything (but it’s not like it is easy for you to do anything about it). Here is a book that will help you make sense of what is going on and get some ideas about what you CAN do.
My Mother’s Bipolar So What Am I? by Angela Grett (with Yvonne Perry).
This is a wonderful book to help you understand what is going on when your parent is bipolar. (Well, to make sense of all the things that you are seeing and having to deal with.) Lots of information about the different ways what you have been doing to cope with the craziness effects other areas of your life. Though it is really written for older teens, it still may be worth tackling even if you are younger.
I”m Not Alone: A Teen’s Guide to Living With A Parent Who Has a Mental Illness (M. D. Sherman & D. M. Sherman)
This book has a lot of helpful info on mental illness, how it affects you when your parent is mentally ill and how to make your way through the complications (and pain) that comes from having a parent who isn’t there (and, sometimes, because they ARE there while under the influence of the illness).
Friends and Family Bipolar Guide by D. Meehl and M. Meehl
You will get some good ideas about how to deal with the challenges of having a family member with bipolar disorder. One thing I like about this book is that the authors identify specific issues and challenges so that you can recognize or anticipate them. And, they give specific suggestions about what to do, how to say things, how to know when you need to step back.
When Parents Have Problems: A Book for Teens And Older Children Who Have A Disturbed or Difficult Parent by Susan Miller
This book reviews parents who are selfish, abusive, suffering and in emotional pain, causing you pain, poor and have difficult personalities. It talks about how this affects you and has some suggestions for what you can do to deal with it (and how to protect yourself). This is worth a read if you have a difficult parent and are feeling really emotionally beat up by it.
For Teenagers Living With A Parent Who Abuses Alcohol/Drugs by Edith Hornik-beer
There isn’t much out there on what to do when you have an addict parent who you still have to deal/live with. You will get some validation for what you are going through in this book and some ideas about what you can do about the things you can do something about (and how to deal better with the things you CAN’T do anything about).
Surviving A Borderline Parent: How to Heal Your Childhood Wounds and Build Trust, Boundaries and Self Esteem by Kimberlee Roth, Freida Friedman & Randi Kreger
OK, this book was written for adults who had a parent who has a borderline personality disorder but it can be relevant to you if you are still in the house and dependent on a borderline parent. It can help A LOT to realize you aren’t crazy and to recognize how parents like this can make you feel crazy (and become a little crazy in how you approach your life). Better now rather than later in realizing what’s happening and beginning to try to counteract the effects. And, you can get some ideas for dealing with typical, crazy-making behaviors (that you may have to adapt to the fact you are still living in the house with your parent).
Here are some pamphlets from the Centre For Addiction and Mental Health on when your parents is depressed, drinks too much, has bipolar disorder, has psychosis or dies by suicide.
Physical Challenges and Chronic Illness (General)
Taking Charge: Teenagers Talk about Life and Physical Disabilities by Kay H. Kriegsman Elinor Zaslow & Jennifer D’Zmura-Rechsteiner.
This out of print book has some good info about a whole range of topics including communication, independence, relationships, dating, sexuality, and family life. Books about this stuff are hard to find (check on Amazon.com or other sites that sell used books.) This book also give info on resources for greater detail on particular topics (e.g., sex).
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
When your parent has PTSD
Finding My Way: A Teen’s Guide to Living with a Parent Who Has Experienced Trauma by Michelle Sherman and Deanne Sherman.
This is a GREAT book. I am not aware of any other like it. This is exactly what you need to figure out what is going on when your parent has gone through a severe trauma and has changed from the effects of those experiences. It is informative and has a place for you to think through how it is affecting your. And, it doesn’t baby you.
Sexual Abuse, Molestation & Date Rape
There are some really good resources and ways to get support if something has happened to you, . It helps a lot to know all the ways that surviving sexual abuse affects you. A good book (like one of those listed below) can help with that. This is very confusing and painful thing to have happen to someone. The effects of what you had to do to get through this are sometimes hard to see at first. Just letting yourself think about it usually leads to freaking out. Take it at your pace but keep at it. It is REALLY important to have a therapist to be there with you and to help guide you along the journey. It is a tough walk but many others have gone before and found a fulfilling, satisfying life without feeling like shit all the time. You can too.
How long does it hurt?: A guide to recovering from incest and sexual abuse for teenagers, their friends, and their families by C. Mather & K. Debye.
An information book based on case studies and interviews with adolescent survivors. Straightforward language and hands-on information that provides a variety of options for escaping abusive situations, taking control of your life, and beginning the healing process.
The Me Nobody Knows: A Guide for Teen Survivors by Barbara Bean & Shari Bennett
This is a workbook that teaches you how to cope with many of the effects of a history of sexual abuse. It is in the form of exercises to help you identify the effects and to develop strategies for coping with the stress and self-perceptions that follow from abuse.
Older Teens and Young Adults
Why Me? Help for Victims of Child Sexual Abuse (even if they are adults now) by Lynn Daugherty.
This is a really good brief (but thorough) book for abused kids. It is the least comprehensive book, in a good way. If you aren’t much of a reader or you need to get the highlights (because just thinking about what happened is a bit too much right now), this is a good place to learn about what all has been happening, why and what you can do about it presented briefly.
Victim No Longer: The Classic Guide for Men Recovering From Child Sexual Abuse by Michael Lew
This book, for older teenage guys and young adult men, takes you through all the aspects of childhood abuse as it effects boys and men. This is excellent and focused on the male perspective. Extremely thorough (I mean it is absolutely complete in the best sense of that) but may be a little too wordy for guys who don’t do a lot of reading.
Surviving Childhood Sexual Abuse by Carolyn Ainscough and Kay Toon.
This is an excellent book (with end of section exercises to do) for older teens and young adults that will take you through the steps of beginning to understand the legacy of being abused as a child and how to walk your way out of it. Lots of quotes from survivors of sexual abuse to highlight the points. It is more elaborate than Why Me? Help for Victims of Child Sexual Abuse and less comprehensive than Victims No Longer. It is always helpful to have a therapist with you along for the journey. It is a tough walk but many others have gone before and found a fulfilling, satisfying life. You can too.
Beginning to Heal: A First Book for Men and Women Who Were Sexually Abused as Children by Ellen Bass and Laura Davis
These women literally wrote the book on overcoming childhood sexual abuse (The Courage to Heal). Encouraging and very basic. This is a good book if you are just beginning to allow yourself to consider what you’ve gone through.
Beyond Betrayal: Taking Charge of Your Life After Childhood Sexual Abuse by Richard Gartner
This is another good book for older teen guys, young adult men and their partners to understand the impact of child sexual abuse on men with strategies for finding a healthy path through to a healthy adulthood. Filled with first hand accounts of how childhood sexual abuse affects you with hope for moving forward.
Date Rape
The Other Side of Silence: Women Tell About Their Experiences With Date Rape by Christine Carter.
This is a difficult book to read. It will take you into the darkness and fear and helplessness of women who have been assaulted by dating partners (or men who thought they were a dating partner). It will expose the ways in which girls and women who have been sexually assaulted in a dating or acquaintance situation are then blamed and shamed. It will reveal the problems with the legal system in discouraging and punishing this criminal behavior. It is worth reading before you become sexually active; not to scare you but to help you be aware of how things can begin innocently or with real promise and end up badly. You need to know about this not so that you fear men but to be informed of possible risks. As a guy, you should know what women have to fear and what you must learn to respect about women.
It’s Perfectly Normal: Changing Bodies, Growing Up, Sex, and Sexual Health by Robie Harris & Michael Emberley
This book has been tested by time. Really good place to learn all about sexual development and sexuality.
Easy for You to Say: Q and As For Teens Living With Chronic Illness or Disabilities by Miriam Kaufman MD
Amazing and wonderful; a book about sex and sexuality for teens with physical challenges or chronic illness. Now you can find out some of the things you wanted to know but were to uncomfortable to ask.
The Underground Guide to Teenage Sexuality by M. J. Basso.
Excellent comprehensive and “readable” book on sex and sexuality for teens. It is very explicit and will provide direct and thorough answers to questions you have about sex. This has an exceptional section on how to say “No”. I highly recommend this book. It is a great foundation upon which to build the decision making aspect of sex and sexuality (as it just presents info in a straightforward, informative way).
Doing It Right: Making Smart, Safe and Satisfying Choices About Sex by Bronwen Pardes.
This is another complete book (though it isn’t as comprehensive as The Underground Guide). It starts from a position that you are going to have sex so here are things to know and things to think about. It seemed to me that it is really written for a younger teenager. Not exactly talking down to you just kind of simplified. So that would make this a good book to read if you want to get the information but don’t usually read books (or reading isn’t really your thing).
Girl Stuff
Cool Women: The Thinking Girl’s Guide to the Hippest Women in History edited by Pam Nelson and written by Dawn Chipman, Mari Florence and Naomi Wax. Great almost magazine like book that provides a quick read on women performers, politicians, scientists, thinkers and doers.
Wonder Women: 25 Innovators, Inventors and Trailblazers Who Changed History by Sam Maggs and illustrated by Sophia Foster-Dimino. Women of science, women of medicine, women or espionage, women of innovation, women of adventure: brief (3 pages) bios of some bad ass women. See what’s possible/realize what women are capable of and have already contributed to humanity.
The What’s Happening to My Body? Book for Girls. New Edition, A Growing Up Guide for Parents and Daughters. Madaras, Lynda & Madaras, Area.
An information guide to the transition from child to young woman with emphasis on puberty and other maturational information. Low key, easy to read and a good source.
The First Time: What Parents and Teenage Girls Should Know about Losing Your Virginity by Karen Bouris, 1995.
You won’t find a better book on the female experience of the first time. The author has gathered women’s stories (of all ages) as a kind of collective experience of how wonderful (and terrible) the first time can be for women. No preaching or particular agenda; just a collection of stories to hopefully impart some wisdom in sexual decision making. Talk to your mother or a trusted adult woman if you are going to read this book. It helps to have their perspective.
Real Girl Real World : A Guide to Finding Your True Self by Heather Gray and Samantha Phillips
This information book is about the issues of becoming a young woman (and being a woman) in our culture. Chapters include The Beauty Standard, Body Image, Eating Disorders, Menstruation Anatomy Orgasms and Masturbation, Coming to Terms with our Sexuality, Being in Charge of Our Sexuality and Feminism (What is it and Do I Care). It is filled with observations and comments by other teenage girls. The information is excellent. It treats all decisions as up to the girl (rather than providing some framework of readiness or morality). It has a girl empowerment slant (which is useful for women in our culture). This is not the book to read first. And, if you are a more conservative person or have a more definite belief about premarital sex being immoral, this book may not be for you. (Not because it tries to recruit you to the dark side or anything. It just won’t as easily fit your way of thinking.)
Guy stuff
Changes in You and Me. Bourgeois, Paulette.
Information about puberty for boys.
The What’s Happening to My Body? Book for Boys, New Edition, A Growing Up Guide for Parents and Sons. Madaras, Lynda & Saavedra, D.
An information guide to the transitions from child to young man with emphasis on puberty and other maturational information. Low key, easy to read, and a good source.
Boys Know It All: Wise Thoughts and Wacky Ideas from Guys Like You by M. Roehm (Editor)
This is an edited book with chapters written by 32 guys giving advice on a full range of problems for boys ranging in age from 7-16. It is fun, informative, and silly. Well written by the boys, good information without a lot of detail, and it bounces from important topics to silly ones.
From Boys to Men: All About Adolescence and You by Michael Gurian
This is an excellent book for boys about what they are going through with an emphasis on the psychological and social rather than just physical. It explains these from a biological perspective in easy and interesting style. This is the best book for kids becoming adolescents I have read. You will want to examine the sexuality section before turning it over to your son. It promotes abstinence by also discusses alternative ways to be sexual as substitutions.
Sex and Sexuality-Abstinence
Sex Smart: 501 Reasons to Hold Off on Sex. (Susan Browning Pogany, 1998)
This is a pretty good book for exploring all the reasons to put off having sex be a part of teenage relationships. It is written in a conversational style (though there is an undertone of scared straight, but it isn’t heavy handed). This can be a good resource for parents who want to talk in an informed way to their teens about abstinence. If you are a parent promoting abstinence, especially if you expect your kids to wait until after marriage to become sexually active, this is a good book for you.
Social Savvy by J. Re’.
Information about just about every kind of social situation with ideas about the polite and appropriate thing to do.
The Stress Reduction Workbook for Teens: Mindfulness Skills to Help You Deal With Stress (Instant Help) by Gina Biegel
Nice format. Comprehensive. Organized. If you want a step by step guide, this will do it.
Too Stressed To Think: A Teen Guide to Staying Sane When Life Makes You Crazy by A. Fox and R. Kirschner.
This and Fighting Invisible Tigers are two of the books to get if you are stressing out (or you want to help keep from stressing out). Better for younger teens (16 and under) due to the writing style.
Fighting Invisible Tigers: A Stress Management Guide for Teens by E. Hipp.
This and Too Stressed to Think are both great if you are feeling stressed. This one has been around for a while and is straightforward, informative and doesn’t talk down to you. Worth having around, especially if you are a high strung (or high stressed) person.
Great article on addiction and the brain from Time magazine
http://www.time.com/time/interactive/0,31813,1640235,00.html
Suicide
If you are checking out this section due to casual interest, great. If you are struggling with the decision about whether you want to continue living or not, go over to the weblinks page. Right now. Then, check out this first book. It is AWESOME (and completely subversive, of the dominant power structure AND of plans to kill yourself)! If you are going to live (and you SHOULD live) then LIVE!
Hello Cruel World: 101 Alternatives to Suicide for Teens, Freaks, and Other Outlaws. Kate Bornstein
This is the book. It is written for teens by a (then) 66yo transsexual (in this case a boy who considered herself a girl and went through with the sex change operation) and so it has a lot of information about alternative sexual identity (and gender politics, if you know something about that kind of thing). If you aren’t gay or a transsexual or the like, just skip over the first part of the book (though it makes really interesting reading and is PROFOUNDLY insightful about pain and suffering and feeling suicidal). Get to the 101 alternatives. Who would’ve thought a 66yo transsexual could be so cool and would have anything a teenager could use. The suggestions are brilliant (and some are really out there, and so worth considering). The message is clear, there are too many ways to be and things to do. There is no better book I can find (despite, or maybe because of, a number of suggestions for alternatives that I would NEVER make to a teen who wasn’t suicidal like 17. make a deal with the devil, 51. be your own evil twin, 59. eroticize the pain and 78. make it bleed. It is time to live without fear (rather than die because of it). Even if you get this book, start a conversation with someone experienced with life (not a teenager!) about what you are feeling. Let them be there for you. Let them help.
When nothing matters anymore: A survival guide for depressed teens. (B. Cobain, 1998)
This is a more general book about depression that includes suicidal feelings written by Curt Cobain’s cousin. Solid book, accurate information but a bit too bookish for most teens. Maybe for younger teens.